Ewwwww!

Why do the basic ideas of cleanliness elude most men?? We have all heard the stories of the "sniff test" to test the wearibility of laundry. Then there's the blowing their noses in the shower because it just washes down the drain. What the hell is wrong with men?
My husband has brought on this latest rant. Honestly, he's not too bad. His clothes are always clean (thanks in very large part to yours truely). He's always well groomed. Clothes match. I'm a lucky girl. However (there's always a however), some of the assinine shit he does throws me for a loop.
The most recent and biggest deal to me has to do with our dog. She is in heat (that is another completly gross-me-out situation). I have rigged up some little doggie underwear and I am making her wear maxi pads. (damn ingenious, i know) However, she manages to wriggle them off and, for reasons unknown to me, goes to the hallway and shakes herself. (i think this little bitch has it out for me) This splatters disgusting doggie-period blood on the wall. (yes, imagine how i feel) While I'm chasing her down, I put him to cleaning the wall. I know (now) that I should just clean it myself. For whatever damn reason, he grabs my washcloth that is hanging over the kitchen sink. I keep one there at all times for convenience. We have a dishwasher but I wipe counters and whatnot. Anyhow, being my knight in shining armor that he is, he cleans the walls. But wait! What does he do with the now doggie-period blood infested washcloth. Hamper? Nope. Washer? yeah right. HE HANGS IT RIGHT BACK WHERE HE GOT IT! IN MY KITCHEN! ON THE SINK! This sets off an hour long rant that has my blood pressure up and his eyes a-rollin.
I wipe kitchen counters with that! I sometimes wipe my hands when I'm cleaning! I cook food in the kitchen! (the dinner fairy does not Poof! it onto the table!) What the hell?
Here's my favorite part though. He says "well, what am I supposed to use?" I tell him to go grab his washcloth that he uses in the shower then when he's done, put it back and use it later when he takes a shower. Somehow, for some reason, this seems absurd to him. UNCLEAN even. Can you freakin imagine.

Valentine's Day!

Here it is already February. Time for my latest rant. My husband has heard this particular rant many times. Valentine's day is fast approaching. I hate Valentine's Day. Hate is a very strong word to me but I truly do hate it. My whole view on it is this:
If you want to send me flowers, why can't you send me flowers because it's Wednesday and you love me? not because it's February 14th and the card and flower companies tell you that you should? Who ever said that a dozen red roses mean that you love somebody? I personally like tulips. Do they jack up the price of tulips in February? Nope....actually, I don't think you can even get tulips in February....beside the point. I don't even like chocolates. Blah.
My daughter's class even has a party for this "hallmark" holiday. They can't have a Christmas party anymore, it has to be called a HOLIDAY Party lest we offend. Nobody thinks twice about the single parents out there that have to buy valentine's day cards and prepare treats and cookies for the celebration. What if I had a big hissy about celebrating valentine's day? Said it violated my religious convictions? I'm sure it would take more than just me but you get the point. Would they change the rules? Don't get me wrong, I don't begrudge my daughter her holiday party but should it really be considered a holiday? Blah!
Anyway, there goes my little rant that usually occurs around this time of year. Doesn't do me any good, just makes me feel better. Oh well, till next time.

I believe....

Our first paper for our English 101 class is to write an essay highlighting one thing that we believe in. I believe that I am making this more difficult than it has to be. It's not that I can't come up with topics or what to write in those topics. My mind goes with about fifty different things in fifty different directions. I start to write about one thing, then my ADD mind switches to a "better" topic and I'm off to that one. Blah! Problem is, I'm my own worst critic. I think it's too cheesy or not cheesy enough. Oh well, I'll suck it up and focus eventually. I just needed a little break to rant about something and I figured, why not put it in my blog?? That's what it's here for right?